Magical Childhood

I read a blog recently titled I'm Done Making My Kid's Childhood Magical.  This mom argues that some parents are excessive in trying to plan too much activities, the most elaborate birthday parties, and expensive vacations in the name of creating magical memories when in fact children do not necessarily need these things for their childhood to be 'magical'.

This made me think about what I am doing to make my kids' childhood magical, and more importantly, do my kids feel their childhood is magical?

We don't have big birthday parties at fancy venues.  Each of my children have had one birthday party at a children's venue.  All other birthdays have been celebrated at home, or at a favorite restaurant with just the family, occasionally their cousins, and for my 12 year old in last couple of years, a few of her closest friends were invited along.

We don't go on expensive vacations every year.  This year was the first time my 6 year old has been on an airplane.   We tend to go on family road trips within a few hours driving distance.

I don't go out of my way to plan 'activities' or crafts or 'special outings' with my kids.  Sure, we'll catch a movie a few times a year (but it's not a weekly or even monthly event).  We've gone to see live theatre plays/musicals, but only when I feel the production is relevant or interesting to them.  As for planning games, crafts,  & activities at home for them?  Well, I do keep an abundance of art supplies, have an enormous amount of Lego, and keep our bookshelves well stocked with books, games, & puzzles.

My children do not have themed bedrooms, designer clothes, or the latest gadgets.  We have a family iPad to share, M2 & M3 wears hand-me-downs from M1, and even she'll wear clothes her older cousins have passed down to her.  Oh, and the 3 of them still share a bedroom - and it's not because they have to, but because they want to.

So what do we do with our children?

We read with our children.   I'll read to my 6 year old (every night, sometimes the same book for days), and I'll read the same books my 12 & 10 year old read so we can talk about the books together.

We eat dinner together and talk about our day at work or school.  Even on the days when the older ones have dance class and they eat late after everyone else is done, we make sure either the Big Oh or myself (sometimes both of us) sit with them to talk about the day while they finish eating.

We hang out together.  Most evenings after dinner all 5 of us are in the same room getting settled down and ready for bed.  This may take over an hour, and during this time we could be brushing our teeth, reading a book, watching TV, surfing the internet on the iPad, or writing a blog, but we all seem to flock to the same room even if we are doing different things.

We volunteer to go on field trips with our kid's classes.  We go swimming & skating with them, not just take them to swim/skate lessons, but actually get in the water and on the ice with them to teach & play with them.  We go bike riding & play in the park in the summer, and we build snowmen & snow forts in the winter.

We take them to their many dance classes, recitals, & competitions.  We sit hours just to see them on stage for a few minutes.  We are there to give them a big smile and hi-five when they know they've done an amazing job.  And we are the first people they seek out to hug and cry to when they know they could've done better.

We make time for traditions.  We make time for friends and extended family.  We emphasize the importance of traditions and and insist our children participate, not by ultimatum & force, but by explaining why it is important and what the alternative would be without friends & family to share traditions with.

Nothing above seems very magical to me.  So I guess I'm not making a very magical childhood for my kids. However, they show me everyday through their words & actions that they wouldn't want it any differently and that is all that matters.

YC